Wow...week three!

Thank you to the seven mentors ( I know two more are on their way), for your thoughtful insights about your campers. It helps me because as I explained in our last supervision, I only get a few snap shots of what really goes on both in the program and in your relationships with your campers. Clearly you all have put some time into thinking about how your campers tick, and as is most often the case, there are no easy answers. We have acting out campers who just seem to get in their own way all the time. We have campers who are closed off and well defended even from the most kind and nurturing attempts. We have campers who hide who they are, and hide from us what goes on in their real lives. And we have campers who confuse us, make us wonder why they are in our program because on the surface they seem to function well. I hear your confusion, and your concerns and your sense of helplessness. I also hear your hope, your belief in yourselves and your sense that in some way you can make a difference in their lives. Recently in our meeting I heard your conviction to making this program a place that is "right" for these kids. They are lucky to have you advocating for what is best for them. That is not something they usually get in this world and you at the very least have given them a place where they can have fun, experience their power, and most importantly feel safe and respected.

Don't stop thinking about what is going on with them and questioning why they behave the way they do. Their behavior will teach you as long as you remain open to the possibilities that behavior works to meet needs. If we understand that they need what we all need: love, attention, control, a sense of safety and a sense of purpose, then we can begin to unravel the mystery of behavior that does not make sense on the surface. It is a simple theory, but much more complicated in its implementation. The purpose of this blog was to encourage you to think more deeply about your campers behaviors, motivations and deep unmet needs. You will continue to do this for the duration of the program and hopefully as you go into life and are challenged by the seemingly unusual behavior of others. You will always have the choice to judge and blame or to go deeper and ask what is that they really need that causes them to act this way? This question is only the beginning of a long journey, but at least it puts you on the path to understanding.